It’s One of Those Days #nanowrimo

One of those days that you have managed to scrounge the perfect amount of covers from your loved one, and scrunched them around your sleeping self in a configuration that creates the perfect body temperature. You’re cozy. Even your feet are warm.

The comfort level is so optimal, you would gladly accept a catheter if it would allow you to stay in bed, reveling in this perfect foot temperature moment. Anything to delay the inevitable warm foot – cold floor moment. THen it happens.

The brain realizes you’re conscious, and all hell breaks loose. It addresses you in it’s best Stewie Griffin voice:

“Well, good morning, sleeping UGLY! Look, while you were busy with that rather disgusting cheerleader dream, some of us were doing real work. Now, I managed to work that hexagon idea from the Borges story you love so much into a structural paradigm for the novel. And, during your 3am to 3:15am Droolfest, I smoothed out the messy plot points and totally restructured the relationship between your protagonist and his wife.
Right then, up and at ‘em. We’ve got a word count goal, jackass. Can’t write this myself y’know. Just a brain. I do the thinking, you do the typing – that’s how we roll.

We’ll be needing some coffee if you want this relationship to work. I can’t be expected to keep achieving these daring acts of brilliance without caffeine, you know. Hmmm? What’s that? Five more minutes NO! I FORBID IT! Brain needs coffee, damn it. Coffee isn’t  the only habit I picked up from the Aztecs, chump. Get up and fill these veins with the strong brown nectar of thought, or I’ll march you up the pyramid and flay you open and offer your cowardly innards to the Gods.”

So begins day four.