Comments on: Learning to Swim

By: Cascade Lily

Cascade Lily — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 05:38:03 +0000

Very clever, funny in a sad way and surreal. I am so glad she decided to with the man with a fish for a head.

By: mazzz_in_Leeds

mazzz_in_Leeds — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 14:54:20 +0000

Haha, I love this. Great visual of the fish guy.
I hope it’s not fish for dinner this evening …

By: Shannon Esposito

Shannon Esposito — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 02:55:39 +0000

oh, this is an amazing story! You took a totally implausible scenario and made me a believer. I may now have a hard time eating one of these guys. And I agree…this should be published.

By: Rosa Say

Rosa Say — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 01:51:37 +0000

Trev, this was fantastic. At the beginning, I briefly wondered why “learning to swim” was your title, and how you could possibly weave it into a diner setting, and as the story developed I was the one swimming in the pure delight of it all. As I’d mentioned last week, I love your descriptive choices and the balance you so skillfully manage with dialog. “Sometimes knowing is more important than doing.” was inspired as the alien intelligence over our human preoccupation with “just do it.”

By: Linda

Linda — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 01:07:16 +0000

Trev, where did you get this story? It is just super. So romantic, in the best sense of the word. Loved this… “lost in their private, damp fugues.” Wish I’d written that line; wish I could think up something as amazing as fish-headed men and go-hither waitresses.

Peace, Linda

By: trev

trev — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 14:41:16 +0000

I wondered if that would happen. I’ve been haunted by the the image of a single fish swimming around in an antiquated diving helmet for 3 weeks, and I had to work it into a story. I intended one fish in a brass helmet like with porthole like windows, perched on top of an otherwise normal body

By: Tony Noland

Tony Noland — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 14:03:39 +0000

This was terrific! So surreal, but at the end, I found myself completely accepting the fish-headed man and only considering the believability of her willingness to go on a moment’s notice!

Great piece.

By: Jodi MacArthur

Jodi MacArthur — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 13:53:15 +0000

Trev!
Oh, man this great. And I mean that in every sense of the word g-r-e-a-t. I can’t even pick out a particular thing I like more although I just loved this sentence. It shows how weird and bizarre the situation is “The man with a fish for a head reached for the sharpened pencil. ” ~~that line should go down in history. I was laughing so hard at the messages back and forth. It’s kind of a weird romantic, threatening, come with me ….or forever be doomed thing with your own alien-ish twist. Oh, just loved this.

This is my first story of the morning. It’s gonna be hard to top this one in my mind.

By: ganymeder

ganymeder — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 13:49:36 +0000

I love the premise and how the story was larger than it originally seemed…end of the world.

I have to admit, I was confused about his appearance though. Does he have a Fishhead with smaller fish swimming around it or is it just the head gear with a bunch of small fish swimming around it? Other than that, I really enjoyed the story. Especially the waitress being friends with the piscine.

What happens after, I wonder? Wouldn’t his planet be completely water based? Would she have to live her life in a contraption to be able to breathe? Inquiring minds want to know!

By: Marisa Birns

Marisa Birns — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 13:09:48 +0000

I, too, thought she came from inside the dishwasher but I was okay with that!

I loved that Jane’s coworker thought of Mr. Fish Head as “unsettling.”

Clever story!